Peace.

Recently, I found myself in a conflict.  A conflict with spectators.  The. Worst.  Angry words, born of frustration, were said. Tears.  Slammed doors.  More angry words.  Then--silence. A silence that felt like it could stretch on forever because of stubborn pride. 

 The next day, I apologized.  Not because I wanted to admit I was wrong.  In fact, my apology went something like this {Out loud} "I'm sorry." {Under my breath} "That you're such an idiot." 😔

One of the "spectators" texted and asked, "Did 'the other offending party' say sorry?"  (I'm trying so hard to keep this somewhat anonymous; but if you know us, you can probably figure out who is who. 😏)

 I said "No, I did."  

"Why would you apologize?" 

I answered, "Because I want to be a peacemaker."  

"Uh, no, that's being a doormat."  

A few days later, my daily Bible plan had me in 1 Samuel 25.  We meet a very rich man named Nabal and his wife, Abigail.  Abigail is intelligent and beautiful, but Nabal is harsh and evil.  They appear in the ongoing saga of David, chosen but yet unseated king of Israel.  King Saul is still on the throne, but he knows his days are numbered.  Hs is spending his final days pursuing David--his replacement on the throne and in the hearts of the people-- with murderous rage.  

David hears about Nabal, and sends some of his younger followers to talk to him.  He instructs them to say "David says hi! And he wishes long life to you; and peace to you, your family, and all that is yours." Once they have him all buttered up, they are to say,  "We've been out in the wilderness and ran into your shepherds.  We treated them well--and by 'well', we mean we didn't bother them or steal from them. Ask them and they'll tell you!  Since we were so nice, could we get some food?"   Nabal dismissively responded, "Never heard of you."  When David heard Nabal's reply, he called all of his followers to armor up! 

As David is preparing for attack with four hundred men, one of Nabal's servants informs Abigail of the coming conflict.  (I love how the CSB puts it--"David sent messengers to Nabal, but he screamed at them.")  The messenger confirms that they were all treated well by David's men; and in fact they provided some much needed protection while they were in the fields with the sheep.  This runner has been a spectator to the conflict and he asks Abigail to talk to her worthless fool of a husband, because he won't listen to anyone else.  But she didn't go to Nabal.  She went right to David.  

She finds David and his men coming towards her.  David is hyping his ragtag band of soldiers up for war by rehashing the whole story:  "I've done everything right for this man, and all I got for it was evil.  He will not get away with it." 

 Abigail, who rode out into the field on a donkey loaded with gifts and supplies, dismounts and kneels before David.  She takes the guilt--the guilt of her harsh, evil, screaming, worthless, foolish husband--as her own.  She takes the blame for his selfish stinginess.  She acknowledges that Nabal IS wrong--after all, stupidity is all he knows-- but she pays the price for it.   David in turn praises her for bravely coming out to a place of conflict, preventing unnecessary bloodshed.  David says to her "Blessed are you, because you stopped me from working salvation with my own hand."  

Abigail recognizes the hand of God on David, and she becomes a peacemaker.  Not a peacekeeper, because there is no peace to keep.   She is a peacemaker.   Abigail--the beautiful, intelligent wife of a stupid, foolish husband--is an Old Testament picture of Jesus for us.  She stood in the midst of conflict--a conflict between a man with no thought for salvation, and a man who thought he could save himself.  She took the blame onto herself.  And she brought gifts of bread and wine--a sign of the New Covenant that Jesus will bring at just the right time.  His body broken for us.  His blood poured out for us. 

Abigail—whose name means “joy of the father”— is not a perfect picture of Jesus.  But that, too, is a good thing.  We see glimpses of Christ in her, but she is just a regular woman.  She provided momentary peace, and then it's gone.  But that should make us long for Jesus, Who provided eternal peace through His sacrifice.  Learning about her beautiful, intelligent, peaceful, FLAWED life makes us long for the One who won't let us down.  

Conflict.  It's inevitable.  We are flawed.  All of us.  When we are wronged--for real or perceived--an apology tastes bitter all the way to our hearts.  The world teaches us that it’s everyone else’s fault.  The world teaches us that a grudge is our right, that forgiveness is weakness.  The world just may see you as a doormat.  But don't be afraid to be a peacemaker.  Be like Abigail.  Be like Jesus.